I have been working on a theory for the past year or so, in which all of America can be divided into an easy to distinguish dichotomy; those people who have worked in food service, and those that have not.  A recent NY Times article talks about how those who work in food service are regularly regarded by those who don’t, their hardships and the pride a waitress should take in her work.

I strongly believe that you can distinguish these two groups of people readily and reliably, based on a few criteria.

People who have worked in food service tend to:
1. Tip better, regardless of service
2. Be more patient with a server who is overworked, new or having a bad day.
3. Be less patient with a server who just doesn’t give a crap about their job.
4. Notices things like the type of fabric in a uniform and potential for discomfort
5. Says hello, looks the server in the eye and retains their name for later use
6. Never snaps, holds plates in the air or makes gestures other than eye contact or a brief raise of the hand to get the server’s attention.
7. Will more readily accept small mistakes in their order and limit special requests
8. Says “thank you” when plates are placed in front of them, or removed.
9. Have a tendency to stack plates prior to clearing for ease of pickup by the server

People who have not worked in food service are more likely to:
1. Withhold tip if service was not perfect, especially if the server was too busy to pay them a lot of attention
2. Has very little patience, regardless of the situation or the server
3. Does not greet the server, just launches into their order or demands to know the specials.  Generally, smiles are forced, or not present
4. Uses any and all means to get the server’s attention, including waving, snapping, pointing at their plate, or lifting a plate to hand off as the server passes by.
5. Rival Meg Ryan’s character in When Harry Met Sally when it comes to special orders
6. Do not acknowledge a server when they place a plate or pick one up, except for a subtle lean away from their arm.

However, after one uncomfortable business/lunch meeting, I have decided that it may be necessary to add a sub-division to this binary; the former waiter/waitress who was so badly abused by their customers that they have decided to return this treatment in kind to the next generation of servers.  This division of the human population regularly meets the criteria of the non-food service person, but will talk up their time in the “service industry” as a way of degrading the current service staff.

On a side note: there is nothing more uncomfortable then sitting at a table with three former waitresses and one’s boss, who though they once waited tables, feels the need to abuse every server in the restaurant, then leave a virtually non-existent tip.