We are sitting in the living room last night, watching the newest episode of Gilmore Girls, when it happened.
“I don’t like the whole Christopher-Lorali story line,” I said, “but I don’t know how they are going to get Lorali to divorce him and get back together with Luke without it being stupid.”
“I know,” says Leslie. “but they have to do something, because she has to end up with Luke.”
Silent contemplation while we watch more of the episode.
“I guess they could always just pull the technicality. ‘oops, you got married in France, but for some reason its not valid.’” I said, with a shrug. “Nah, that would be lame.”
More silent watching.
“You know,” Leslie says, “they have never had a major character die on this show.”
“That’s true.”
“So, they could kill Christopher off, then Lorali would be free to be with Luke.” On the television, Christopher gets into his car and Leslie says, “See, he’s going to get in the car and DIE!”
Suddenly, we watching the episode with increased interest, waiting for any possible excuse for Christopher to be killed off. He hangs the flat screen TV, could it possibly fall and crush him? The dog looks at him funny, maybe Paul Anka has rabies, bites him and he DIES. He starts to walk up the stairs, maybe he will fall and die. I am sitting on the couch, watching, but Leslie is chanting and urging the plot on.
“Come on, die Christopher, die. DIE, DIE, DIE.”
Alas, Christopher did not meet his end during the episode, only stormed off after reading the letter that Lorali wrote as a testament to Luke’s good character for his custody case. Christopher has escaped . . . for now.
But then, for the final scene of the episode, we see a boring, basic scene of Richard “Grandpa” Gilmore teaching a class at Harvard, with Rory in the seats, watching with granddaughterly love. Suddenly, Grandpa begins to breathe heavily, grasps his arm, then collapses, while shouts of “call an ambulance” play over the black screen of credits. The previews for next week talks about a “family tragedy brings Luke and Lorali back together,” and it certainly sounds like Grandpa might bite the dust.
My reaction?
“You killed Grandpa! You pointed your psychic death mind ray at the TV and missed! You hit Richard instead of Christopher.”
She will try to deny it now, but I swear, there was a glint of satisfaction in her eye as she came to realize the power that she holds in her brain. She need only to think it and your beloved television character will die a most horrible death.
(I apologize to those non-Gilmore Girls watchers for the detailed yet melodramatic sounding synopsis)
4 comments
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January 31, 2007 at 9:39 pm
Leslie
FOR THE RECORD:
Before a certain (if she keeps this up, soon to be FORMER) roommate of mine misleads you with this malicious and woefully inaccurate account of my psychic powers, I would like to point out some critical errors:
A) I never thought that he would die from going up the stairs…I thought that he would slip going DOWN the stairs.
B) Everyone should be thanking and listening to ME, because if they did, I would have made sure that the RIGHT (read: most hated) character on the show died: Christopher. But no, the script writers had to draw the curtains on the more obvious (and admittedly, less far-fetched) character. I was ANTI-death to Grandpa. How could I be sending death rays his way?
C) And as an aside…can I just say that the closing scene with the credits going while the audio continues, “Call 911!” was SO stolen from the season finale of the West Wing?! (“Who’s been hit? Who’s been hit!?”)
I rest my case.
January 31, 2007 at 9:44 pm
Rebekah
Ladies and gentlemen, please note that at no point during her rebuttal does Leslie deny the psychic powers she has been granted. In fact, in point B, she basically admits to having these powers. I contest that she does indeed have these super powers, but is as of yet unable to control them (luckily for other TV villains and possibly me).
I re-iterate, my roommate, (current and soon to be former when she abandons me for grad school, so don’t try to threaten me missy) is a psychic murderer of unsuspecting television characters. In the case of Grandpa Gilmore, I am willing to reduce the charge to manslaughter or negligent homicide, but if Christopher drops dead of a stroke next week, its going to be murder 1.
January 31, 2007 at 9:46 pm
Leslie
Someone’s been watching too many episodes of Heroes…and Law and Order. That’s ok, I’ll just watch Psych, with my favorite West Wing character, Charlie! (See? It all goes back to the West Wing…)
February 2, 2007 at 3:21 pm
Rebekah
What ever you do, don’t tell her your favorite television character- one day when you leave your dirty coffee mugs on the kitchen counter AGAIN, she’ll squint her eyes and they will have a stroke or a bad car accident and you will be left in suspense for another full week, or even a summer hiatus, wondering if she has killed or simply maimed.
Beware dear friends, beware.